Do you ever have those moments, where your mood is low but decision paralysis prevents you from helping yourself? That rut of “what do I want to do, when I feel like doing nothing but doing nothing makes me feel worse”? We’ve all been there, we all get those moments, especially after a particularly bad day. They might strike as soon as you wake up, after a physically/emotionally tiring day or out of nowhere for no reason. And with the world feeling like a pretty dark place right now, it’s understandable to be feeling this way more than usual.
Since I completed a course of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy to help me overcome a worry disorder, I now keep a list of ideas and supplies to tackle these down moments whenever they strike. Now i’m sharing those with you to give you a few tools up your sleeve to turn your day around!
So what can you do to pick yourself back up after a down day?
Important note: If you feel depressed or worried for your own safety, call your doctor, 111 or in an emergency 999. If you are worried about your mental health, it is important to seek professional help.
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Journal or keep a worry diary
The humble paper and pen is often underrated as a remedy for troubles of the mind. Writing out your worries can make them feel smaller, adding perspective and unburdening your brain from having to remember or replay the events. I keep a worry diary next to my bed, which I use when i’m feeling particularly anxious about something. Not only does the writing itself help, but reading back through previous worries can also be therapeutic. Especially when they now look so irrelevant and unworthy of worry, it’s comforting to see evidence that the worries you currently face may too soon fade.
If its anger that’s got you down, maybe a conversation you can’t stop replaying or rehearsing responses to, pick up a pen! Sometimes writing your frustration is just as releasing as saying it to the person themselves, but without the potential guilt or regret which may follow. Particularly useful when you want to reply to a work email with the colourful language which may get you into trouble – take it to paper instead. Afterwards you can keep it, screw it up, burn it, whatever you desire!
You will need: A notebook or paper and a pen.
Try mindfulness
If your thoughts are in overdrive and you can feel your blood pressure rising, your heart racing under the pressure of the spiring thoughts – pause. Channel your mind into something else, returning to the present moment. There are a number of different ways you could do this. Here are a few of my favourites:
- Name 5 things you can see, 4 you can hear, 3 you can feel, 2 you can smell, 1 you can taste.
- Practice square breathing, in for 4, hold for 4, out for 4.
- Practice alternative nostril breathing techniques.
- Lay down or sit with your eyes closed, starting from the toes working your way up your body, recognise one body part at a time and noticing how it feels (the weight, the feel against the surface, the temperature) and relax the muscle.
- Listen to a Headspace App mindfulness episode.
- Enjoy a mindful moment. For example, have a cup of tea in the garden. Really notice the flavour, the heat, the sensation in your body. Recognise the sounds, the breeze, the colours, the smells in the air.
You will need: Nothing but yourself! (Although a Headspace subscription (YouTube is a free option) can help if you need guided meditation).
Practice gratitude
I will never forget when i watched Brene Brown’s ‘A Call To Courage’ on Netflix for the first time, and she talked about how when she fears losing things she loves, whether that’s people or moments in time, she practices gratitude instead. For example, a thought can be changed from a negative, ‘my daughter is flying the nest and i’m losing her’, to a positive, ‘i’m so grateful and blessed to have her, such a strong independent woman in my life’.
Starting with a simple gratitude diary, either every morning/night or just in moments of mental turmoil, can help us refocus and retreat out of a negative thought spiral.
What are you grateful for in your life? Don’t be afraid to look at the small details in your every day.
You will need: A notebook/paper and pen (don’t have access to these? Just think of what you are grateful for. Count 10 things out on your fingers if that helps).
Cleanse and pamper
Never underestimate the power of a warm shower or bath to help wash your troubles away. I don’t know if its the feel, sound and pureness of the water rushing over my skin, or the idea of washing off the day and feeling fresh and new – but when in a major mental rut, this is my first go-to remedy.
What makes you feel better, and more human? Here are some ideas:
- Bubble bath, with optional bath salts (such as Epsom salts or Pink Himalayan salts), essential oils, candles and music.
- Face cleanse, mask and moisturise.
- Dry brush or exfoliate and moisturise your skin.
- Hair mask (my favourite at the moment is this affordable Argon Oil Mask by OGX)
- Cuticle oil and home manicure/pedicure.
You will need: Whatever supplies you need to support your pamper session, whether thats products or access to a bath/shower.
Nourish your body
Often when we feel a bit pants after a bad day, we lean towards carb-heavy and sugar-dense foods for comfort (I know i’m guilty of this). Sometimes you know this is what you need to feel better, but other times nourishing yourself can feel refreshing and rewarding, a gift to your body. Why not try throwing together a tasty smoothie of fruits or veggies for a quick yet enjoyable hit of vitamins, or a nourish bowl of salad and veg?
Here are some of my favourite smoothie/juice combinations:
- Ice, splash of milk, banana and strawberry smoothie
- Ice, blueberries, raspberries and strawberry smoothie
- Apple, orange, carrot and ginger juice
Want something a little more indulgent? Banana protein pancakes with homemade raspberry chia jam are delicious!
Perfect your bedtime routine
Ease yourself into a peaceful slumber with a routine that will mentally and physically relax and prepare you for sleep. Going to bed feeling stressed or angry isn’t good for anyone. Try adding a few of these steps to your bedtime routine:
- Stop looking at your phone or TV 1 hour before sleep.
- Avoid caffeine.
- Bath/shower and put on clean pyjamas (a 40 minute soak in Epsom salts works wonders to relax your muscles).
- Spray lavender spray on your pillows.
- Apply lavender balm to your temples (to make your own read: How To Make Temple Balm).
- If there is anything still swirling around your mind, write it down on paper or in a worry diary.
- Use an electric diffuser with essential oils.
- Read a light hearted book in bed.
- Listen to a guided bedtime meditation or relaxing music/sounds to fall asleep (the Headspace App is a brilliant resource for this).
For more tips read: 10 Tips For A Good Nights Sleep on the Sistabliss Tribe blog.
Read a book
Reading can be incredibly therapeutic, and an excellent distraction whisking you away into your imagination. Do you have a favourite book? Or a book that you read once, and always remember how much you enjoyed reading it? After a bad day, pick it up and read it again! Sometimes, when you’re feeling overwhelmed or worried, reading a book where you already know the storyline, the ending and how it makes you feel is comforting and safe.
Not keen on that idea? Pick up a new book, any book to get your mind focussed – preferably something with light hearted content… you don’t want to be crying into the pages, unless with laughter of course!
You will need: A book, or device to download an ebook (the Amazon kindle app can be downloaded onto your phone for easy access to millions of titles – get a free 30 day trial of Amazon Kindle unlimited)
Prepare for tomorrow
Today might not have gone your way, but there is always room for a brighter tomorrow. Spend some time planning your day. Whether that’s a to do list, morning routine, bedtime routine or all of the above. Try these prompts:
- What lessons did you learn today?
- Is there anything you could you do differently tomorrow to have a better day?
- What makes you feel happy or relaxed? Can you fit a couple of these activities into your day?
You will need: Paper and pen, or planner/diary
Get outside
The suns Vitamin D, fresh air and nature have long been known as miracle remedies for our mental wellbeing. If you can, go for a walk or sit in your garden or local green space. Easier in the summer of course when the evenings are lighter and longer. But if you can, get away from traffic and crowds, and spend some time in nature, practicing mindfulness as you walk or sit for a peaceful moment.
You will need: Just yourself and the great outdoors!
Move your body
You don’t need to push yourself to do an intense sweaty workout, unless you feel so inclined. But moving your body in any way you can manage can do wonders, releasing tension from your muscles, clearing your mind and getting those happy-inducing endorphins going. Some ideas to try after a bad day (YouTube is a great resource for tutorials too):
- Yoga practice at home (level up with a soothing yoga playlist, candles and essential oils).
- Pilates workout at home.
- Go for a walk, jog or run.
- Cardio workout – if you want to sweat out the stress, try something a little more intense.
- Go for a swim indoors or outdoors – theres something about feeling weightless in the water which makes the mind feel lighter too.
- Bike ride
- Gym session
You will need: You can move your body with no equipment at all! You will benefit from a mat to practice yoga, pilates and some workouts.
Reach out to your tribe
If you feel up to talking, reach out to your tribe for support after an overwhelming or bad day. Maybe a listening ear to vent to will help to put your day and worries into perspective. After all, a problem shared is a problem halved!
You will need: Someone you feel comfortable talking to, like a close friend or family member.
Get crafty or bake
Slow your mind by putting it to something fun and creative. Even better if that something results in a tasty snack! Mindful colouring can genuinely be an excellent tool to calm an overwhelmed brain or get creative in the kitchen by pulling together what ingredients you can find to whip up a treat. Whatever hobbies bring you joy and get your mind pumping with colourful positive juices, give it a go.
You will need: Whatever supplies you need for your chosen craft or recipe.
I really hope you don’t need these tips and every day is filled with beautiful experiences (we can wish right?), but if you do find yourself feeling down or stuck in a mental tornado after a bad day, I hope these tips help you to help yourself feel better.
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Stay safe out there. Rosie Louise x
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