My First Trimester – What I Never Expected!

If you didn’t know already, you do now. I’m pregnant! Currently 16 weeks as I write. I have always been fascinated with pregnancy. I love when favourite instagram personalities become pregnant and I get to watch their incredible beautiful journey. Seeing them stroke their perfectly round bellies as they talk about how amazing they feel, their glowing skin and pure joy. Whilst all of this is true and pregnancy has been a blessing and a joy, I have now noticed there is a realness missing from these perfect pictures painted.

By not seeing the other side of pregnancy, when I came to live it myself for the first time, I found myself feeling quite alone in my symptoms. I even uttered the words to my mum “I don’t think i’m doing pregnancy very well”, because I didn’t see myself reflected in those women on tv or on social media. How sad is that!?

But I know i’m not alone, and I know in hindsight, what I experienced was totally normal. The first trimester is just a rarely spoken about phase of pregnancy. I hope to bring a little more realness to my platforms, so when other women embark on their first pregnancy, maybe they can take a little comfort in knowing their feelings are normal and they are doing a spectacular job!

So now for the down low, let’s spill the tea.

10 first trimester experiences I never expected

So I must start off by making a very important point clear, I am not a health professional and I speak purely from my own experience of pregnancy. Just because I did or didn’t experience symptoms, it doesn’t mean you should or shouldn’t. Always speak to a health professional if you are concerned.

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In the dark

So let’s paint a picture. You look down at those two blue lines and think “ahh am I really pregnant?!”. Before my friends had been pregnant, I assumed at this point you marched on down to the doctors to have your wonderful news confirmed. In reality, in the UK at least, this is far from the case. I simply had to complete a form online, and wait 4 weeks for someone to call me back to schedule an initial appointment with a midwife to ‘book in’ the birth. Before waiting another 4 weeks for the 12-week scan where my pregnancy was finally confirmed.

This wait was unbearable for us, so we paid £80 for a private early scan at 7 weeks to confirm everything – money well spent in our minds.

24/7 nausea and a rampant appetite

I’d heard of morning sickness, particularly in the first trimester. But I really wasn’t aware of the intense nausea women can experience without vomiting. For me, it hit around 6 weeks and was totally debilitating. If my stomach wasn’t full, and hunger crept in then so did the nausea which triggered uncontrollable retching (that’s fun in public). I had to eat every 1-2 hours to manage it, requesting breakfast in bed, and even snacking on biscuits during the night.

Other remedies I tried included drinking ginger beer (naturally non-alcoholic), sucking anti-morning sickness sweets and using anti-sickness pressure wristbands. The nausea has eased since week 11, but it still hits me in waves and I don’t expect that to change any time soon.

Food baby or baby baby?

I can genuinely say I experienced a “bump” from week 5 – all thanks to bloating! My clothes were tight almost immediately, so sizing up has been a must even this early on. After meals, my tummy has been so bloated that my skin felt like it might rip it was that tight.

Acne galore

Why has modern society always seemed to associate pregnancy with glowing skin? Whilst patiently awaiting that iconic glow, all I experienced was an increasing number of spots appearing. Particularly around my nose, chin and forehead. This could be hormones, or quite possibly the increased amount of sugar I consumed since being pregnant – whoops. But it’s fair to say my optimistic bubble was quickly burst when I learned acne was common, and that “glow” generally derives from little more than hot flushes.

As I read that pregnancy can increase our skins sensitivity, I overhauled my skincare routine. I put down the Elemis (sorry – I still love you) for now, and swapped for more simple sensitive and scent free products. Plus a combination of two acne-banishing serums and increasing the use of my electric cleansing brush. The following products have really helped my skin, however always talk to a health professional before using new products during pregnancy to ensure they are safe for you to use.

Camomile Sumptuous Cleansing Butter 

La Roche-Posay Toleriane Sensitive Fluid Moisturiser

La Roche-Posay Effaclar H Hydrating Cleansing Cream

Fancii Electronic Facial Cleansing Brush

The Ordinary Azelaic Acid Suspension 10%

The Ordinary Niacinamide 10% + Zinc 1% High Strength Vitamin and Mineral Blemish Formula

First trimester anxiety

Prior to becoming pregnant, I have been very open about the fact i’ve suffered from anxiety. I was incredibly lucky to have access to 6 months of CBT therapy in 2018 thanks to our amazing NHS, and continued to take a very small dose of medication to help my associated racing heart and migraines. This medication wasn’t safe during pregnancy, so I stopped taking it once we decided to start trying to conceive.

As the first trimester of pregnancy is statistically the highest risk, I lived with relentless anxiety for the entire time. I can’t tell you how many times I googled things that can go wrong, symptoms and statistics – not forgetting the chat rooms I spent hours scrolling through. With the benefit of hindsight, I know this was neither healthy or helpful for me and in the future would stay well away from chat rooms in particular.

Ultimately I managed my anxiety through meditation and CBT techniques. My husbands support and positive outlook was invaluable and i’m so grateful for him. I highly recommend the Headspace app, which even has a course tailored around pregnancy worry.

Jumping at shadows

The weirdest symptom of my first trimester of them all! I don’t know if its linked to the increased anxiety or just mama bear instinct kicking in, but I have been on edge constantly. So far, I have completely jumped out of my skin because: I thought a button on my jumper was a spider, the sun caused a moving shadow in the car, my husband has walked into the room, the floater in my right eye looks like a fruit fly and a stranger moved slightly too abruptly in my eye-line (this one is far too common).

Body image struggles

This one was quite the shock for me, in my naivety! I actually remember looking forward to no longer worrying about my waistline once I was pregnant. But in reality, knowing there is a little baby growing in there, doesn’t just completely and suddenly overhaul the ingrained obsession I had with my figure and weight. It takes time, understanding and self love to overcome those ways of thinking. Something I’m still working on.

I struggled mostly with the limbo phase of looking different, my clothes getting too tight, but still not looking stereotypically pregnant. When maternity clothes were loose, but my normal jeans cut in and looked very unflattering. Luckily this phases only lasted a few weeks and i’m now enjoying the comfort of stretchy maternity clothes that fit just right.

Here are my favourite items which are just so comfy i’ve practically lived in them:

Information overload

Boy, do I have a lot to learn! Having been 16 when my sister was born, I have had more experience than most first time mums when it comes to everything baby, and I thought I was pretty prepared. But it’s incredible how advice changes over a decade. I have devoured books throughout my first trimester and have only uncovered a fraction of what there is to learn about pregnancy, birth and caring for bub. It’s pretty handy nature gives us 9 whole months to prepare!

On finding out I was having a baby, my mum gave me some sterling advice. She said “everyone will want to give you unsolicited advice from pregnancy to motherhood. Just nod along, only you decide what to take on board”.

What I have found quite tricky to navigate, is the judgement on modern advice from older generations. It can be very overwhelming reading and following current advice on what you can and can’t do, trying to do the best for your developing baby. From avoiding hot baths, to cutting out certain chemicals in skincare product, staying away from troublesome foods and drinks, and even sleeping exclusively on your side. It can be very disheartening when questioned and told “how ridiculous, we did all those things and our children turned out fine”, or “don’t be stupid, women have been doing that for hundreds of years”. In those moments, I try to remind myself of how lucky I am to have the benefit of advanced science which they didn’t have (easier said than done when the pregnancy hormones just make you want to cry at everything!).

These are my three favourite books so far, which are really well structured and easy to understand – perfect when you’re feeling a little out of your depth.

Missing scorching hot baths

For me, a long soak in a hot bubbly bath is medicine. Aching muscles? Bath. Busy brain? Bath. Just plain bored? Bath. So when I discovered baths during pregnancy should be kept luke warm, short, oh and hold the bubbles, I was a little lost!

But we adapt, and i’ve learnt to find bath time benefits in the weightlessness, the feel of the water on my skin, the calming sound of the trickle from the tap, and the scent of a candle to help me relax instead.

Back pain? In my first trimester?!

Naive me associated back pain in pregnancy with the overwhelming weight of a growing bump. So I was surprised when I started experiencing ligament pain in my back, hips and tummy in my first trimester. Supposedly caused by muscle relaxing hormones allowing my ligaments to stretch as needed, the pain after a physically demanding day has rendered me sofa bound a number of evenings. Groaning like an old lady as I attempt to stand up or pick something up. At least I have an excuse to be lazy for a while!

The NHS has some really useful tips for supporting these changes, and simple yoga poses such as cats and cows has helped to keep my spine mobile.

This post ended up longer than I intended (sorry!). And as much as this post might feel full of challenges and negatives, every second is an incredible miracle and i’ve truly never been happier – so bring on the second trimester!

Always seek your medical advice from your healthcare team.

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Stay safe out there. Rosie Louise x